Report #3 from the capitol, while we are here investigating rumors of the threat to take over Fupppsylvania's homelands and media (see FUPPPS April 17 editorial, Homeland in Peril)
 

The "more mood music link" on this button will take you to a live radio station, which can serenade you as you read the article.  Follow directions on the screen when it comes up. Aloha!
 

Flounder Town, Fuppsylvania, April 24, 2004:  Townsfolk really love to chew on the topic of where to go for the honeymoon, we discovered at The Snug Pub yesterday afternoon.

Seems the winner, paws down, is Kauai, the garden isle of Hawaii.  "It's lush and beautiful, guv," our chief informant Elliot Gooding told us over a glass of stout.  "Open lands and trees just ripe for marking.  Hardly any dogs there.  A right haven for us, no matter what breed."

"Gooding's spot on, guv," Sandra Whimslett, the waitress who'd been one of our first contacts, agreed.  "And besides that, they are wonderful to all who want to get married, whether it's boy and boy, boy and girl, or girl and girl.  Makes no never mind to them.  They celebrate with the same fab foods -- poi, and roast suckling pig, with those wonderful bones as take-home presents for all tbe NIPtual guests.

"You can't find a better, more romantic place to have your muttimonial," Ms. Whimslett added, rather misty-eyed, we thought.

We wondered whether any other spots received as much acclaim.  "Next in line for fun," Gooding replied to our surprise, is Finland.  "But only in the winter, and only for the long-haired among us," he clarified.

"Why is that?"  we asked.

"Because they build this ice dog house every year.  Everything is made of ice, the house itself, the chairs, the beds, the bar.  It's crystal clear, and weirdly other-worldly.  Of course it's cold, so that's why it's usually the likes of St. Bernards that go. But when they get back, there are definitely stars in their eyes."

What are some of your favorite post-NIPtual retreats?  Let us know in the space below.  We'd love to pass on the word as a service to our visitors!