FUPPPS Editorial: Was Noah A Man Ahead of His Time?

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     NOAH'S ARK -- THE OFFICIAL EXPLANATION

 

FUPPPS Headquarters, CA, June 11, 2004:  It has come to our attention recently that it is time to re-examine the age old question of what really happened on Noah's Ark.

 

We all know Noah and his family dutifully selected representatives from a wide variety of animals, per instructions, in twos, to be saved from the massive floods the Heavenly Weatherman predicted.  What we haven't known is what factors were considered in making up the pairs?

 

Who did the actual inspections to determine the sex of each half of a couple?  How did the inspectors manage to avoid being whomped upside the head by an angry hoof?

 

With the sloppy record keeping of the time, it is hard to tell exactly what transpired in the choosing, and indeed, on the ark.  After all, it's difficult to type with paws on those tiny laptop computer keyboards. And with no thumbs, the spacebar hardly gets used except by accident. We all know as well that bicuspids are notoriously ill-suited to sharpening #2 pencils.

 

So, until proven otherwise, we say Noah may have become a man ahead of his time, willy nilly.

 

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